How To Make A Good Show Sound Rubbish, lesson one

You've seen Terminator: The Summer Glau Posterior-Kicking Chronicles, I presume? No? Well, go and do so instantly, for it is shiny. But anyway, the point is that it's a very good show, and now that they're into their second season the execs are doing their very best to make it not so good.

Oh, the show itself is still good; if anything, it's getting into its stride now. I'm still not sure I buy Lena Headey as Sarah Connor - she has some very big boots to fill - but the show's great. But a little spiel at the start has been tacked on, for those who left their attention spans in their other trousers and can't remember what happened before. Or who the characters are. Or a vague recollection of two of the most-watched sci-fi action films of the last quarter-century. So here it is:

"In the future, a computer programme called Skynet will declare war on the human race.

"Machines have travelled back in time, taking human form to terminate John Connor, the future leader of the resistance.

"Sarah Connor, John's mother, teacher and protector.

"Cameron, a Terminator reprogrammed to defend them at all cost.

"Derek Reese, John's uncle, and commanding officer with the resistance.

"Together, they fight to stop Skynet from ever being created. The battle for our tomorrow... starts today."

No, I'm not making this up. They really recite that at the start of every bloody episode now.

So I started thinking. What if other shows did that?
( Spoofery continues after the cut... )